I saw a quote recently that really stuck out to me. It said “I have never had to unscrew another woman’s lightbulb in order to shine.” 

This quote really stuck out to me because it got me thinking about how often women are pitted against each other. Whether it’s for a man’s attention, for a role at work, or for any other reasons, the concept of female rivalry is something that is very socially acceptable. You see it on reality tv (we love to watch women hate each other) and in the movies (fighting in a love triangle), but somehow this has become more of a reality than we intended it to be.  

There are plenty of women out there who will openly admit to struggling to maintain female friendships. We’ve all heard the phrase, “most of my friends are guys” or “it’s so much easier being friends with guys”. 

But if we aren’t in competition with each other, what is the problem with having female friendships? Why can’t we be friends with other women who are pretty, funny, smart, hard working and not be threatened by them?

Why are powerful women threatened by other powerful women? There is no limit to the amount of powerful women who get to walk this Earth. No one is taking your place. Why are we not pooling our power together to take over the world? 

Most often you can see female rivalry come into fruition in the workplace. If there is one token woman in a boardroom full of men, there can be multiple women vying for that coveted seat.

Instead of competing for a seat at the table, why are we not pulling up another chair? 

The problem really isn’t that we are competing for a seat, the problem is that there is only one seat for women at the table. Why aren’t we more concerned about that, instead of focusing on competing with each other? 

If you struggle to cheer on other women, it’s time to take a look at yourself and what’s going on internally. Are you threatened by her? If so, why? Most of the time when we’re threatened by someone, it says more about us than it does about them.

We aren’t going to change the status quo by continuing to compete with each other. So ladies, these are my my calls to action for you: 

• Never let anyone compliment you by putting another woman down. 

• Tell another woman when she has something in her teeth. 

• Support your female coworkers fiercely. 

• Find your girl gang of like minded women, and create an inclusive environment for any women who want to join your gang.

• Be a girl’s girl and look out for other women. We deal with enough hardships in life just by being women, we don’t need to create them for each other.